My friend from college, Barbara Wrahtz Sokolov, died on Sunday afternoon...or as those involved with the Orthodox Church say 'fell asleep on the Lord'. And then you say "Memory Eternal!"
It's dangerous to try to respectfully interpret practice and idiom in another culture or a subculture like the Orthodox Church. For example, the slogan on the Diocese of the West website says "The Holy Orthodox Church, the same yesterday, today and tomorrow" which took me aback in these progressive times.
Yet my friend died too young. Like my memories of her, she wrote about her impending death in a calm measured graceful way.
In her own words...Oct 3, 2008
My strength is slowly waning. I feel more and more tired, and have increased difficulty breathing when I am up. I am comfortable when resting however, and I experience very little pain. The green valley and surrounding mountains that I see from through the sliding glass door in my bedroom fill me with peace and gratitude for the beauty of creation, and the love and company of family and friends make me happy. While it is difficult and sad to let go of this world and especially my dear ones, I truly feel the presence and love of God guiding and embracing me, and filling me with joy and expectation of His Kingdom.
I wrote about her on September 9, using a 1973 picture. But those pictures are so old, as my son would say even about himself 'back in the day'. They're fun and they hold a lot of context of their times and a glimmer of the future that we've now experienced but can not yet judge.
There's a picture from her website from a few weeks ago, showing Barbara with her adult children all gathered together. Touching and bittersweet, it was intended to be a last picture. I thought she looked well there not close to death. But how much can you tell from a small picture?
So I will take a risk here and include a picture stolen from the net. From 2004, when, I'm guessing, things looked brighter and more intact. Again, I'm taking this picture out of its context so please, loyal readers, let me know if I've gravely misinterpreted something. From a group of pictures posted on the Saint Vladimir’s Orthodox Theological Seminary entitled "Feast of the Three Hierarchs Ordination of Kirill Sokolov to the Holy Diaconate". A formal occasion welcoming her eldest son Kirill Christopher Sokolov to some level of the Orthodox clergy. He refers to himself as Protodeacon Kirill. A lot of ritual unfamiliar to me portrayed in this collection of photos. Clearly a great honor.
This group photo likely taken after the ceremony. Barbara is in the back row, third from left. Standing next to her husband Viktor Sokolov who attained a high position in the Orthodox clergy in San Francisco. Originally a dissident 'back in the day', he met Barbara in Moscow, they married and Viktor eventually emigrated. He became interested in the Orthodox Church, became a clergy and Barbara became Matushka Barbara. They raised 5 kids with their youngest being Naomi's age (18). Viktor died, also of lung cancer in 2006. I do not know if he was diagnosed at that time. Protodeacon Kirill is in the front at the very left. His wife stands at his side. I don't know anything about the picture she holds.
The Orthodox Church is steeped in ritual and tradition. The men, the clergy, wear the golden brocade robes and special ornamental jewelry. The women, the wives, dressed in modest street clothing.
Matushka Barbara and Rev. Sokolov at a proud moment.
My interpretation, only.
As my friend jj said "Blessings to her and to her family" May the Lord keep you and grant you peace.
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